ot: Signs of where you're from..

[MzMcLean2000]

You know you live in California when...

1. You make over $250,000 and you still can't afford to buy a house.

2. The high school quarterback calls a time-out to answer his cell phone.

3. The fastest part of your commute is going down your driveway.

4. You know how to eat an artichoke.

5. You drive to your neighborhood block party.

6. Someone asks you how far away something is; you tell them how long it will take to get there rather than how many miles away it is.


You know you live in New York when...

1. You say "the city" and expect everyone to know you mean Manhattan.

2. You have never been to the Statue of Liberty.

3. You can get into a 4-hour argument about how to get from Columbus Circle to Battery Park, but can't find Wisconsin on a map.

4. You think Central Park is "nature."

5. You believe that being able to swear at people in their own language makes you multilingual.

6. You've worn out a car horn.

7. You think eye contact is an act of aggression.


You know you live in Alaska when...

1. You only have four spices: salt, pepper, ketchup and tabasco.

2. Halloween costumes fit over parkas.

3. You have more than one recipe for moose.

4. Sexy lingerie is anything flannel with less than eight buttons.

5. The four seasons are: winter, still winter, almost winter and construction.


You know you live in the Deep South when...

1. You get a movie and bait in the same store.

2. "Ya'll" is singular and "all ya'll" is plural.

3. After fifteen years you still hear, "You ain't from 'round here, are ya?"

4. "He needed killin'" is a valid defense.

5. Everyone has 2 first names.


You know you live in Colorado when...

1. You carry your $3,000 mountain bike atop your $500 car.

2. You tell your husband to pick up Granola on his way home, and he stops at the Day Care Center.

3. A pass does not involve a football or dating.

4. The top of your head is bald, but you still have a ponytail.


You know you live in the Midwest when...

1. You've never met any celebrities, but the mayor knows your name.

2. Your idea of a traffic jam is ten cars waiting to pass a tractor.

3. You have had to switch from "heat" to "A/C" on the same day.

4. You end sentences with a preposition: "Where's my coat at?"

5. When asked how your trip was to any exotic place, you say, "It was different!"


You know you live in Florida when...

1. You eat dinner at 3:15 in the afternoon.

2. All purchases include a coupon of some kind -- even houses and cars.

3. Everyone can recommend an excellent dermatologist.

4. Road construction never ends anywhere in the state.

5. Cars in front of you are often driven by headless people.

[ILuvKevsBrows]

Welcome to Baltimore

First you must learn to pronounce the city name.... It is Bawl-mer or Ball-tee-more, depending on if you live north or south of Rt. 40.

Next, if your road map is more than a few weeks old, throw it out and buy a new one. If it is a Howard County map and is a day old it is already obsolete.

On Monday you don't wash your clothes, you warsh them. Before you eat a meal you don't wash your hands, you warsh them in wooder.

Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere, Baltimore has its own version of traffic rules...."Hold on & pray."

There is no such thing as a dangerous high-speed chase in Baltimore ... we all drive like that.

All directions start with... "The Beltway...."....which has no beginning and no end.

The morning rush hour is from 6am to 11am, the evening rush hour is from 1pm to 7pm... Friday's rush hour starts Thursday morning.

If you actually stop at a yellow light you will be rear ended, cussed out, and possibly shot. When you are the first one on the starting line, count to 5 when the light turns green before going to avoid crashing into all 5 drivers running the red light in cross-traffic. However, if you don't go as soon as it turns green, you get the finger, a blowing horn, or both.

Construction on I-97 is a way of life and a permanent form of entertainment. Interesting that it's called an "interstate," it runs only from the Beltway to Annapolis. Opening in 1992, it has been torn up and under re-construction ever since. (Does former Gov. Glendenning have any relatives who build highways?)

All unexplained sights are explained by the phrase "Oh, we're in GLIMBURNIE!"

If someone actually has their turn signal on it is probably a factory defect.

Car horns are actually "Road Rage" indicators.

All old ladies with blue hair and Buicks have the right of way. PERIOD

All roads mysteriously change their names as you cross intersections.

A trip across town (north to south) will take a minimum of four hours, although the tunnel does have, on occasion, more than one lane open. But never on holiday weekends.

The minimum acceptable speed on the Beltway is 85mph, anything less is considered downright sissy.

The Beltway is our daily version of NASCAR.

If the humidity is 98+ and the temperature is 98+ it's May/June/July/August/September.

If it is 10 degrees, it is Orioles Opening Day.

If it is 110 degrees, it is opening day at Ravens Stadium.

If you go to a football game, pay the $75.00 to park in the "Ravens Lot." Parking elsewhere could cost up to $7500.00 for damages, towing fees, parking tickets, etc.

If some guy with a flag tries to get you to park in his yard during Preakness ... run over him! It's probably not his yard anyway.

Oh yeah... Welcome to Baltimore, Hon!

[MzMcLean2000]

All old ladies with blue hair and Buicks have the right of way. PERIOD
a freaking men!!!! Love it Mel!

[daydreamer]

You know you're from Pennsylvania....

You've never referred to Philadelphia as anything but "Philly." And New Jersey has always been "Jersey."

You refer to Pennsylvania as "PA."

"You guys" is a perfectly acceptable reference to a group of men & women.

You know how to respond to the question "Djeetyet?" (Didyoueatyet?)

You learned to pronounce Bryn Mawr, Wilkes-Barre, Schuylkill, Bala Cynwyd, Duquesne, New Tripoli, Tunkhannock, Punxsutawney, Tamaqua, Susquehanna, Allegheny, and Monongahela.

You know what a "Mummer" is, and are disappointed if you can't catch at least highlights of the parade.

The first day of buck and the first day of doe season are school holidays.

You can use the phrase "fire hall wedding reception" and not even bat an eye.

You can't go to a wedding without hearing the "Chicken Dance," at least one Polka and either an Italian song (sung in Italian,) or "Hava Nagila."

At least 5 people on your block have electric "candles" in all or most of their windows all year long.

You know what a "State Store" is, and your out of state friends find it incredulous that you can't purchase liquor at the mini-mart.

You own only three condiments "A-1, Heinz 57 and Heinz ketchup".

Words like "hoagie", "crick", "chipped ham", "sticky buns", "shoo-fly pie", "pierogies" and "pocketbook" actually mean something to you.

You can eat cold pizza (even for breakfast) and know others who do the same.

You know exactly what to do when your mother tells you to "red up" your room.

You know the time and location of every "wing night" in a 20 mile radius.

You don't think people from Philly or Pittsburgh talk funny.

You don't understand all the hype about Rolling Rock beer; You've been drinking it for years even though Iron City is better.

You consider an exotic vacation to be a trip to Ocean City, Virginia Beach, or Myrtle Beach.

Words like "hoagie", "chipped ham", and "pop" actually mean something to you.

You think very little of an Amish buggy on the road.

You can go 2 weeks in winter without sunshine and think this is normal.

You know that Blue Ball, Intercourse, Climax, Bird-in-Hand, Virginville, Paradise, Mars, and Slippery Rock are all PA towns.

There is no such thing as a "Philly Cheesesteak". It's just called a "Cheesesteak."

You not only have heard of Birch Beer, but you know that it comes in several colors: Red, Blue, White, Brown, Gold.

You consider Pittsburgh to be "out west," and you know the fastest way to Philly is the Turnpike.

Know that Yuengling is pronounced "Ying-ling," and believe that it really is a premium beer

You have an uncontrollable urge to buy bread and milk when you hear the word "snow."

You live within two miles of a plant that makes potato chips, corn chips, pretzels, candy, or ice cream, or that packages turkeys, beans, or bologna.

You say things like, "Outen the lights," "I'm calling off today," and "They're calling for snow."

You only buy your beer and soda by the case.

You think the roads in any other state are smooth.

You know the Penn State cheer, and although you've never attended Penn State, you are a most obnoxious Penn State fan.

You never see any Confederate Flags, except on the Gettysburg Battlefield.

You prefer Hershey's Chocolate to Godiva.

School closings due to snow take the radio stations a half an hour to finish, because just about every town has its own school district.

You have the Rolling Rock bottle memorized: "From the glass lined tanks of Old Latrobe, we tender this premium beer for your enjoyment. . . . "

Elect pro-life Democrats and pro-choice Republicans for Governor

Frequently go "with," e.g., "You going to the market? Mind if I come with?"

Refer to something as "a whole nother," e.g., "That's a whole nother issue."

You REALLY HATE antiquers. On Sunday mornings you would scream "Go back to Jersey!" at least once on the way to church.

You know where to buy "Opera Fudge" and that it has absolutely no connection to the Opera.

The only Jewish people that you've ever met have been from New York or New Jersey.

[scarlet]

You know you live in the Deep South when...

1. You get a movie and bait in the same store.

2. "Ya'll" is singular and "all ya'll" is plural.

3. After fifteen years you still hear, "You ain't from 'round here, are ya?"

4. "He needed killin'" is a valid defense.

5. Everyone has 2 first names.

All True, I don't have two first names but often get called by my frirst and middle name, lol.

[scarlet]

These can refer to the deep south as well


"You guys" is a perfectly acceptable reference to a group of men & women.

You know how to respond to the question "Djeetyet?" (Didyoueatyet?)



The first day of buck and the first day of doe season are school holidays.

[Ask Me If I Care]

Originally Posted by Kev's Speedo

Welcome to Baltimore

First you must learn to pronounce the city name.... It is Bawl-mer or Ball-tee-more, depending on if you live north or south of Rt. 40.

Next, if your road map is more than a few weeks old, throw it out and buy a new one. If it is a Howard County map and is a day old it is already obsolete.

On Monday you don't wash your clothes, you warsh them. Before you eat a meal you don't wash your hands, you warsh them in wooder.

Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere, Baltimore has its own version of traffic rules...."Hold on & pray."

There is no such thing as a dangerous high-speed chase in Baltimore ... we all drive like that.

All directions start with... "The Beltway...."....which has no beginning and no end.

The morning rush hour is from 6am to 11am, the evening rush hour is from 1pm to 7pm... Friday's rush hour starts Thursday morning.

If you actually stop at a yellow light you will be rear ended, cussed out, and possibly shot. When you are the first one on the starting line, count to 5 when the light turns green before going to avoid crashing into all 5 drivers running the red light in cross-traffic. However, if you don't go as soon as it turns green, you get the finger, a blowing horn, or both.

Construction on I-97 is a way of life and a permanent form of entertainment. Interesting that it's called an "interstate," it runs only from the Beltway to Annapolis. Opening in 1992, it has been torn up and under re-construction ever since. (Does former Gov. Glendenning have any relatives who build highways?)

All unexplained sights are explained by the phrase "Oh, we're in GLIMBURNIE!"

If someone actually has their turn signal on it is probably a factory defect.

Car horns are actually "Road Rage" indicators.

All old ladies with blue hair and Buicks have the right of way. PERIOD

All roads mysteriously change their names as you cross intersections.

A trip across town (north to south) will take a minimum of four hours, although the tunnel does have, on occasion, more than one lane open. But never on holiday weekends.

The minimum acceptable speed on the Beltway is 85mph, anything less is considered downright sissy.

The Beltway is our daily version of NASCAR.

If the humidity is 98+ and the temperature is 98+ it's May/June/July/August/September.

If it is 10 degrees, it is Orioles Opening Day.

If it is 110 degrees, it is opening day at Ravens Stadium.

If you go to a football game, pay the $75.00 to park in the "Ravens Lot." Parking elsewhere could cost up to $7500.00 for damages, towing fees, parking tickets, etc.

If some guy with a flag tries to get you to park in his yard during Preakness ... run over him! It's probably not his yard anyway.

Oh yeah... Welcome to Baltimore, Hon!

Love it, and so true. lmao

[ILuvKevsBrows]

Originally Posted by Ask Me If I Care

Love it, and so true. lmao

Do you live around here?

It's so true about the rearending, LOL. I'm glad that I take the bus and don't have to drive around here.

[Ashley]

hahah, I'm from cali. so true.

[Erika]

I'm from New Jersey. I curse in every sentence. I sure as hell don't pump my own gas. I know what real pizza tastes like & probably hate the pizza from your favorite pizza place.
All good mornings begin with a bagel, all good nights end at a diner - preferably w/ cheese fries and of course all good parties end with a fight.

It's a SUB, not a grinder, a hero, or worse, a hoagie. what the hell is a grinder dammit?. It's taylor ham, not pork roll or canadian bacon.

I go down the shore, not to the beach. My second and third homes are the malls and dunkin donuts parking lots. I see real guidos every day. I judge people by what exit they are off the parkway. I know 65mph really means 80. When I cut someone off, I get the horn and the finger & expect it.

I'm from New Jersey and I love it cause we do it f-ing best.

[songwriterchk20]

I can relate to damn near all of these....lol

You Know You're From Alabama When...

You have a party or a barbeque whenever Alabama plays Auburn in football. (Iron Bowl, baby!)

You go to Gulf Shores every summer.

You call the Atlanta Braves baseball team "us" like they're actually from Alabama.

You would much rather visit Florida than California.

You don't "take", you "carry" or "tote"... as in "You want me to carry you down to the 7-11?"

A soft drink isn't soda, cola, or pop, it's Coke.

You call it a "buggy" and not a shopping cart.

You've said "fixin' to," "might could," or "usetacould" during the last week.

Someone you know has used a football schedule to plan their wedding date.

You know the meaning of the phrase "Fobbed again."

You can properly pronounce Eufaula, Opelika, Bayou La Batre, and Oneonta.

The Talladega 500 is the biggest sporting event of any sort during the entire year.

You know exactly what chitlins and mountain oysters are, and you know someone who eats them anyway.

You think that people who complain about the humidity in other states are sissies.

You aren't surprised to find rental movies, groceries, ammunition and bait all in the same store.

You've missed a wedding or a funeral to go to a football game.

Asian food is always "CHINESE" regardless of the fact that it may actually be Korean or Japanese or Thai

[Erika]

You Know You're from New Jersey When...

...you recognize or can relate to at least 10 of these:

* You've been seriously injured at Action Park.

* You know that the only people who call it "Joisey" are from New York (usually The Bronx) or Texas.

* You don't think of citrus when people mention "The Oranges."

* You know that it's called "Great Adventure," not "Six Flags."

* You've ordered a hard roll with butter for breakfast.

* You've known the way to Seaside Heights since you were seven.

* You've eaten at a diner, when you were stoned or drunk, at 3 am.

* Whenever you park, there's a Camaro within three spots of you.

* You remember that the "Two Guys" were from Harrison.

* You know that the state isn't one big oil refinery.

* At least three people in your family still love Bruce
Springsteen, and you know what town Jon Bon Jovi is from.

* You know what a "jug handle" is.

* You know that a WaWa is a convenience store.

* You know that the state isn't all farmland.

* You know that there are no "beaches" in new Jersey - there's
"The Shore," and you know that the road to the shore is "The Parkway" not "The Garden State Highway."

* You know that "Piney" isn't referring to a tree.

* Even your school cafeteria made good Italian subs, and, you call it a "sub" not a "submarine sandwich" or worse yet, a "hoagy" or a "hero."

* You remember the song from the Palisades Park commercials.

* You know how to properly negotiate a Circle.

* You knew that the last question had to do with driving.

* You know that "Acme" is an actual store, not just a Warner Bros creation.

* You know that this is the only "New..." state that doesn't require "New" to identify it (like, try ...Mexico, ...York, ...Hampshire (doesn't work, does it?).

* You know how to translate this conversation: "Jeet yet?" "No, Jew?"

* You only go to New York City for day trips, and you only call it "The City."

* You know that a "White Castle" is the name of BOTH a fast food chain AND a fast food sandwich.

* You consider a corned beef sandwich with lettuce and mayo a sacrilege.

* In the 80's you wore your hair REALLY high.

* You don't think "What exit" (do you live near?) is very funny.

* You know that the real first "strip shopping center" in the country is Route 22.

* You know that people from 609 area code are "a little different."

* You know that no respectable New Jerseyan goes to Princeton - that's for out-of-staters.

* The Jets-Giants game has started fights at your school or local bar.

* You live within 20 minutes of at least three different malls.

* You can see the Manhattan skyline from some part of your town.

* You refer to all highways and interstates by their numbers.

* Every year, you had at least one kid in your class named Tony.

* You know where every "clip" shown in the Sopranos opening credits is.

* You've gotten on the wrong highway trying to get out of Willowbrook Mall.

* You've eaten a Boardwalk cheesesteak with vinegar fries.

* You have a favorite Atlantic City casino.

* You start planning for Memorial Day weekend in February.

And finally...
* You've never pumped your own gas.

[GMB]

I've lived in both Louisiana and Texas for a long time so I feel like both states are home to me. Where did you guys find these?

[sea_elle]

You know you're a Montrealerr when:

-You pronounce it "Muhntreal", not "Maahntreal".
-You say things like "I have to stop at the guichet before we go to the dep."
-You know that a "poutine", "steames", "frites-sauce", "joe-louis", and a Pepsi is a full course meal.
-You like your pizza all-dressed, and you can get one with any of the following toppings: fries, spaghetti, ground beef.
-You agree that Montreal drivers are crazy, but you're secretly proud of their nerves of steel.
-The most exciting thing about the South Shore is that you can turn right on a red.
-You know that the West Island is not a separate geographical formation.
-You have to bring smoked meat from Schwartz's and bagels from St-Viateur if you're visiting anyone west of Cornwall.
-You refer to Tremblant as "up North."
-You know how to pronounce Pie IX.
-You actually notice and point out stop signs that still say "stop".
-You believe to the depth of your very being that Toronto has no soul.
-Your high school reunion is held in Toronto because most of your classmates live there now.
-You greet everyone; from lifelong bosom friends to someone you met once a few years ago, with a two-cheek kiss.
-You've been hearing Celine Dion jokes longer than anyone else.
-You can watch soft-core porn on broadcast TV, and this has been true for at least 25 years.
-You cringe when English sports announcers pronounce French hockey player names.
-You were drinking cafe-au-lait before it was latte.
-You order fries 'with sauce', not 'with gravy'.
-Shopper's Drug Mart is Pharmaprix and Staples is Bureau en Gros, and PFK is finger lickin' good.
-For two weeks a year, you are a jazz afficianado.
-You need to be reminded by prominent signage that you should wait for the green light.
-Everyone on the street - drivers, pedestrians, and cyclists - think they're immortal, and that you'll move first.
-You're proud that Montreal is the home of Pierre Trudeau, Mordechai Richler, William Shatner, Leonard Cohen, Guy Lafleur, Charlie Biddle, and the Great
Antonio...and, you consider Donald Sutherland (and by default, Keifer), and Roch Carrier Montrealers, too.
-You know that Rocket Richard had nothing to do with astrophysics.
-You know the difference between the SQ (cops), the SAQ (booze), and the SAAQ (car insurance).
-You measure temperature and distance in metric, but weight and height in Imperial measure.
-You show up at a party at 11 p.m. and no one else is there yet.
-April Wine once played your high school (alternatively, Sass Jordon or Gowan).
-You know that Montreal is responsible for introducing the following to North America: bagels, souvlaki, smoked meat and Supertramp. Also, Chris de Burgh and the Police.
-You don't drink pop or soda, you drink soft drinks.
-You have graduated from high school and have a degree, but you've never been to grade 12.
-You never thought that Corey Hart was cool, but you know someone whose cousin or something dated him.
-There has to be at least 30 cm of snow on the ground in less than 24 hours for you to consider it too snowy to drive.
-You remember where you were during the Ice Storm.
-You used to be an Expos fan, but now all you really miss is Youppi.
-You're a Habs fan; always was, always will be...
-You know that your city's reputation for beautiful women is the result of centuries-old couplings between French soldiers and royally-commissioned whores (aka Les Filles du Roi).
-You discuss potholes like most people discuss weather.
-You encounter bilingual homeless people.
-While watching an American made-for-TV movie, you realize that "Vienna" is actually Old Montreal, that "New York" is actually downtown and that the "The Futuristic City" is actually Habitat '67.
-You find it amusing when people from outside Quebec compliment you on how good your English is.
-You secretly listen in on French morning radio 'cause they're much funnier and the music is better.
-You agree that CHOM sucks, but there's no alternative.
- You don't find it weird that there's a strip club on every corner downtown.

[SteakSauce]

You Know You Are From Sweden When...

* The first thing you do upon entering a bank/post office/chemist etc. is to look for the queue number machine.

* You accept that you will have to queue to take a queue number.

* You rummage through your plastic bag collection to see which ones you can keep to take to the grocery store and which ones can be sacrificed for rubbish.

* When a stranger on the street smiles at you, you assume:
a: he is drunk
b: he is insane
c: he's an American

* The reason you take the ferry to Finland is:
a: duty free vodka
b: duty free beer
c: to party hearty...no need to get off the boat in Helsinki, just turn around and do it again on the way back to Sweden.

* You associate pea soup with Thursday.

* Your notion of street life is reduced to the few teenagers hanging out in front of the railway station on Friday nights.

* You refuse to wear a hat, even in minus 20 degree weather.

* You hear loud-talking passengers on the train. You immediately assume:
a: they are drunk
b: they are Finnish
c: they are American
d: all of the above

* Your front step is beginning to resemble a shoe shop

* You know that "religious holiday" means "let's get wasted!"

* You know that "men’s public bathroom" is another phrase for footpath.

* You know that more than three channels means cable.

* You think that riding a bicycle in the snow is a perfectly sensible thing to do.

* You sit in your booked seat at the movie theater even if there are only 2 other people there and your seat is in the front row, on the side.

* You use ’mmmm’ as a conversation filler.

* You wear shorts and t-shirt when it's barely 10*C in July - because it's July.

* You think women are more than equal than men and deserve to have better positions in the work place.

* You think it's perfectly normal for a wife to be relaxing and watching TV while her husband looks after the kids.

* When a stranger asks you a question in the streets, you think it's normal to just keep walking, saying nothing.

* You assume that anyone who apologises after bumping into you is a tourist.

* Hearing the words f**k, sh*t, b*tch on daytime TV seems perfectly normal to you.

* You expect to find the glove you dropped in February hanging on a post in June

* You will squeeze past somebody rather than say excuse me.

* Everybody has an outdoor thermometer at home and they all compare temperatures when they get to work.

* You think that smoking is really not that bad, even for 13 year olds.

* You take two hour naps at work and the idea of losing your job never crosses your mind.

* You take it as a given that your wife/husband will get so wasted on Midsommar that he/she will end up in bed with someone other than yourself.

* You can't throw a plastic bottle away with out having a guilty conscience.

* You know how to take care of a toddler, a pram with baby, a shopping trolley (that needs to be returned for the coin), paying for and bagging all your own groceries, without ever once expecting anyone to offer to help you.

* You hide 5 or 6 bottles of spirits in your suitcase, one or two in your backpack, and put just one in the duty free shopping bag.

* You think there is nothing wrong with planning Christmas around Kalle Anka (The one hour Donald Duck/Disney Christmas special on Christmas Eve).

* It's May. It's 15*C degrees. And you're stretched out on your balcony in your bikini trying to get a head start on your tan.

* You don't understand why your friend from Mississipi took offence when you referred to him as a yankee.

* You refer England, Scotland and Wales as just 'England'

* You just have to watch "Grevinnan och Betjänten" (Dinner For One) on New Years Eve.

* It's perfectly normal to hear teenage girls say fitta (c*nt) as a swear word.

* You find it reasonable that reviews of non-Swedish movies with a Swedish actor in them should use at least half of the space available to discuss how good or bad the actor was in it, even if he had just one line.

* You sing holiday drinking songs instead of Christmas carols.

* You prefer everything in life to be "lagom".

* You'd rather not disturb anybody, even if there's an emergency, so you sit there quietly and wait until somebody actually notices you.

* All of your conversations resemble a chess game, with each participant quietly and patiently awaiting the other to finish their turn.

* Three for the price of two is the deal of a lifetime, regardless of what it is.

* You use a coupon to save 5 kronor on something that costs over 100 kronor.

* You feel a certain sense of pride when you see Swedish people in films or on foreign TV shows.

* Drinking is the fundamental pillar of your social network, be it coffee or alcohol.

* You make fun of tourists.

* You think there is no such thing as bad weather, only bad clothing.

* You think is perfectly normal that nobody talks on the bus, train or tunnelbana. In fact you sit down as far away from anybody as possible to avoid anybody from talking to you.

* Your house looks like the showcase to IKEA.

* You think it's acceptable that builders start banging and hammering at 5.30am.

* Seeing full-frontal male or female nudity in a commercial or on TV does not surprise or offend you, in fact you find yourself giggling.

* You can't understand why people live anywhere but in Sweden!